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tv   Jimmy Kimmel Live  ABC  January 31, 2013 11:35pm-12:35am EST

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>> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight, jennifer lawrence. katie couric. and music from tegan and sara. with cleto and the cletones. and now to entertain us all, here's jimmy kimmel! >> jimmy: hello. thank you. hi, everybody. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching, thank you for joining me here tonight in our studio.
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thank you for -- you know what? thank you for being not just a lover, but also a friend. i appreciate it. on sunday, the san francisco 49ers take on the baltimore ravens in super bowl xlvii. and if this super bowl goes well, next year they're thinking about doing a 48th. [ laughter ] here's what i don't get, shouldn't they -- they spend a lot of money on these commercials, shouldn't they run like the beer and the chip commercials before the super bowl? it's not like you're going to run out to the store after the game and stock up for next year, right? [ laughter ] it's like selling tinsel on christmas. i have a lot of eating planned for sunday. hot wings. nachos. sausages. maybe a walrus, who knows? [ laughter ] the inside of my stomach is going to look like a michelle obama nightmare. guillermo, where are you watching the super bowl? what's your plan? usually we watch together, but i have my pilates class on sunday. >> yeah. i think i'll watch it at home.
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>> jimmy: your going to watch it at home? you think? have other people invited you over? >> yeah. >> jimmy: who has invited you other? >> a couple of co-workers. >> jimmy: some of your co-workers? >> i'm going to watch it at home. yeah, because -- >> jimmy: i see. gotcha. it's a good idea. [ cheers and applause ] i've been asking guillermo to practice something. i've been asking him to study. and tonight, guillermo, is your final exam. can you -- did you practice? >> a little bit. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that means -- in english, that means no, by the way. can you pronounce the name of the san francisco 49ers quarterback whose name is currently on the tv screen. >> jimmy: this will be our third attempt now to do this. >> colin kaepernick. >> jimmy: almost. that's pretty close. that's all right.
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he'll have it by next year. >> colin kaepernick. >> jimmy: he started out saying corky cabbage patch or something. there's a petition going around asking president obama to make the day after the super bowl a national holiday. [ cheers and applause ] that's a good idea. it's been a long, exhausting day and i'm sitting on the couch watching tv, i need a day off. the petition has almost 12,000 signatures. do we need a day off after the super bowl? and isn't that kind of disrespectful to our real holidays, like free slurpee day. it is, by the way. the big story everyone is following this super bowl is that of the harbaugh brothers. jim harbaugh is the coach of the niners. his brother john is the coach of the ravens. on sunday, they'll become the first head coaches as brothers to face off in the super bowl. which has to be both exciting and confusing for their parents. either way, one of your kids is going to win, the other one loses. it's an uncomfortable situation
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to be in. which jersey do you wear? does mom wear one, does dad wear the other? here's ma and pa harbaugh, they had a press conference in new orleans with how they plan to handle this situation. >> nfl history being made on the sidelines this coming sunday. >> for the first time ever, two brothers will be coaching against each other for the super bowl title. but what's especially interesting is how their parents are dealing with these most unusual circumstances. >> so which son is going to win the big game on sunday? >> well, we get asked that a lot, and the answer i always give is that john is -- he's not very bright. he's dumb as a post. so with that in mind, i think jim. it's going to be the 49ers. >> yeah, jim. not john. >> go, jim! go, jim! >> jimmy: it's just like my parents. [ applause ] it's hard to find things to talk
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about because there are two weeks leading up to the super bowl, so there's a lot of focus on this jim and john harbaugh thing. they have another brother. there's another harbaugh who is going to be at the game on sunday. in fact, had a little profile of him last night on espn. >> super bowl xlvii, brother against brother. all eyes are on jim harbaugh of the san francisco 49ers, and john harbaugh of the baltimore ravens. they're calling it the har-bowl. but few realize there's a third harbaugh brother with just as much fire and dedication as his siblings. >> i'm josh harbaugh. i'm the middle brother. and, you know, football is my life. i'm just like my brothers. i mean, it's our passion. >> like his brothers, josh is preparing for the super bowl. unlike his brothers, josh's role is that of a backup dancer for
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beyonce's halftime show. ♪ everywhere i look i'm surrounded by your embrace baby i can see your halo you know you're my saving grace ♪ >> this is my third halftime show. madonna was nothing short of grueling. you know, i got poked in my eye by one of her horns. janet jackson and i got very, very close. you could say we had our own wardrobe misfunction. beyonce is a whole other level. whole other level. >> be fierce. be sasha fierce. sasha fierce. sasha fierce! you can do it! >> you're talking hoops and banners. and luckily i've been trained in both of these. ♪ i can see your halo halo halo ♪ >> yes, people might tune in for the har-bowl, but what are people going to remember?
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the har-bath time show. >> i am the champion! [ applause ] >> jimmy: the third harbaugh brother. there's jim and there's john, they're coaches, and then that one's a dancer. oh, you understood? all right. all this talk about the harbaugh brothers inspired us to come up with a new game today. it's called "couple, siblings, or strangers." here's how it works. we'll show you a pair of people we found on hollywood boulevard. your job is to guess whether they're romantically involved, siblings, or two random strangers we made stand next to each other for this. you ready? >> hi, i'm gloria. >> i'm lance. and we are -- >> couple. >> jimmy: couple. siblings. most people say couple.
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>> strangers. >> jimmy: they look like a cute couple. next up? >> i'm brendan. >> i'm kathleen. >> and we're -- >> jimmy: okay, we're going to have to get everyone to respond individually. this one seems pretty mixed. >> a couple! [ applause ] >> jimmy: the denim attracted them to each other. [ laughter ] all right, who else? >> hi, i'm keith. >> hi, i'm sheryl. >> and we're -- >> jimmy: siblings? everyone says siblings. >> a couple. >> jimmy: they are a couple. not siblings. all right. next? >> hi, i'm marina. >> and we are -- >> jimmy: everyone says siblings.
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>> siblings! >> jimmy: that is right, they're siblings. they look alike. >> i'm pete. >> i'm j.d. >> and we're -- >> couple! >> jimmy: all right, everyone says couple. >> a couple. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: who do we have next? >> hi, i'm sabine. >> i'm connor. and we're -- >> jimmy: everyone says strangers. couple of couples? no siblings? all right. let's hear it. >> strangers. >> yeah. >> jimmy: that was a nervous laugh. but i am going to get to know her when i put her in my trunk later. we're going to take a quick break. we've got a lot of stuff for you tonight. this week in unnecessary censorship, dr. phil with manti te'o's girlfriend/boyfriend.
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>> jimmy: hello, welcome back. jennifer lawrence, katie couric, and music from tegan and sara are coming up. dr. phil had a big day today. dr. phil aired the first of a two-part interview with ronaiah tuiasosopo, better known as the man behind the manti te'o girlfriend hoax. it was good. if you haven't been following this story, this guy pretended to be a woman online and then engaged in a multi-year relationship with the notre dame football player.
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anyway, he sat down with dr. phil today and i have to say, from what i could tell, manti te'o's girlfriend seems like a very nice guy. [ laughter ] i look forward to seeing him on next season's "celebrity apprentice." [ laughter ] but if you didn't already, you should definitely watch this. dr. phil was relentless. he insists that the woman's voice that manti would hear was his. but they have voicemails and there's no way it was him. >> much of this relationship you had with manti was on the phone. >> right. >> you can speak with that voice. >> correct. >> let me hear that voice. >> i can't. >> give me a little of the voice. >> i'm sorry, it's really awkward and uncomfortable. >> jimmy: you know what? i get uncomfortable having lady sex talk with dr. phil as well. very understandable. they said it belonged to his
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cousin, tina, but dr. phil took the tapes to the fbi and had voice analysis done. >> i contacted the private voice detectors and they said the chance that you are the person on that voicemail is like one in ten million. >> yep. >> that that is not you. not even possible. you're telling me that you're telling the truth. >> yeah. >> and i'm telling you that the best scientific analysis in the world is saying it is not. so i say just do the voice. >> jimmy: do the voice or i'll kill you! you hear me, woman? do the voice! eventually dr. phil did convince him to do the voice. that part airs tomorrow. i can't wait. by the way, can you imagine if dr. phil was your actual doctor? i'm sorry, but dr. phil isn't seeing any patients today, he's interrogating manti te'o's imaginary girlfriend. meanwhile, one of our guests tonight, katie couric, scored an
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even bigger interview last week with manti te'o himself. i also want to ask her about another big interview she has coming up. a new confession that they say is going to blow manti and even lance armstrong out of the water. >> next week on "katie," parking lot security guard, guillermo. in his first televised interview since the scandal. >> you thought you had a friendship with a real chihuahua. >> that is correct, ms. katie couric. >> but was it a real chihuahua? >> no, it was a mix of a chihuahua and a poodle. >> so it was a chipoodle. >> it was. it was a chi-poodle. >> and later, the question everyone wants answered. >> guillermo, are you gay? >> no. no. no. >> exclusively on "katie."
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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: and one more item. it is thursday night, it's time for our weekly tribute to the fcc where we bleep and blur thing where is they need it or not. it is "this week in unnecessary censorship." >> washington is abuzz about last night's "60 minutes" where they saw president obama and secretary of state hillary clinton [ bleep ]. >> we're going to [ bleep ] each other hard. >> all i'm thinking is i want to [ bleep ] this gimpl. >> she was a hit at the golden globes and now amy poehler has [ bleep ]. >> it's so [ bleep ] slow. >> people don't need any heart figuring out winter will be with them a little bit longer. they can feel it on their [ bleep ] faces. >> welcome to the world of something. >> no more [ bleep ] around, i got to get back to work. >> i've come to believe that
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most [ bleep ] don't believe they're [ bleep ] in the beginning. >> it's called [ bleep ]. >> you use all this anger that you have got and you [ bleep ] yourself. >> name a place on your body you wouldn't want a doctor to stick his [ bleep ]. adam? >> in your butt. >> in your butt! >> jimmy: we have a nice show for you tonight. katie couric is here. we have music from tegan and sara. and we'll be right back with oscar nominee jennifer lawrence. stick around. possible applebees are full of flavor and under 550 calories each? i'll believe it when i taste it. i believe it! i can dig it! [ male announcer ] ok, a bit of an overreaction, but... uh oh...what now? ♪ ah, the old great taste, under 500 calories flash mob bit. eesh. the new zesty roma chicken & shrimp and roasted garlic sirloin. big flavor, under 550 calories.
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. >> jimmy: welcome back. tonight on the program, katie couric is here. and then with music on their new cd called "heartthrob," tegan and sara from our outdoor stage. tomorrow night you can see all of best moments from the week wrapped up in a big ball. and next week we've got a big lineup including bradley cooper, melissa mccarthy, kate mara. we'll have music from anita baker, gary clark jr., and tim mcgraw. so join us next week. two years ago when our first guest attended the oscars as a nominated actor for the first time, she couldn't even buy a beer in the lobby.
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this time she can get as loaded adds s as she wants. she is nominated for "sliver linings playbook," it's in theaters now. please say hello to jennifer lawrence. how you doing? >> i'm good. >> jimmy: it's good to see youle. >> good to see you. >> jimmy: how you feeling? all right? i know you've been a little sick. >> a little sick. i'm a little drunk. your producer made me do two shots of tequila. >> jimmy: well, we have the top people in the business here. two shots of tequila, huh? >> two shots of tequila, and a beer. but the beer was my decision. >> jimmy: oh, okay. so you're okay though? everything's all right? >> yeah, i'm doing good. i just went to the doctor today, got a chest x-ray of my lungs and discovered that my breasts are uneven. [ laughter ] that was all i saw. >> jimmy: it's okay. >> i was like standing there
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with these doctors and they're looking at my lungs, it felt like an elephant in the room. i was like are my breasts uneven. and they were just kind of like stifled and uncomfortable, obviously. so i kept thinking well, i'm going to dig myself out of this hole by bringing it up again. he was like well, our radiologist will get back to you about your lungs. and i was like and my breasts. he was like bye. >> jimmy: but are you worried about that? is that a concern? >> it wasn't until the x-ray. i think i just hope no one will ever see my breasts in an x-ray. i hope i'm never seen in that light. >> jimmy: in the x-ray light. you've had an unbelievable couple of years, but this last month has been particularly unbelievable with the golden globe. congratulations on that. >> thank you. [ cheers and applause ] thank you. >> jimmy: and that's a fun event to go to. everybody drinks at that thing. you get to sit at a table with famous people. >> famous people are everywhere. >> jimmy: who were you sitting with at the table? >> i was sitting with my family
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and bradley and david. everybody but -- adele was in the table -- it was the next table over. and i had such a high fever and i felt like i couldn't move and i saw adele and there was nobody in the way and she was sitting in the table by herself. my dad was sitting next to me here. and i just reached my arm out and went -- my dad goes, jen, what's the matter? i was like, it's adele. adele right there. >> jimmy: you had no quality time with adele at all? adele was probably happy at that point that you weren't talking to her. >> come over with 103 -- >> jimmy: fever hands. i wonder how many people you infected at the golden globes. >> i wonder how many people were infecting me. >> jimmy: wouldn't you love to know who it was? i think about this all the time. remember they used to tell you when you're a kid that if you pee in the pool, it would turn red. >> they should do that. >> jimmy: i think it might be better not to know.
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because -- >> then you'd be in fights with a lot of people. >> jimmy: exactly. you'd be fighting with people all the time. >> a totally plausible reason to be mad at somebody. you gave me walking pneumonia. you're in big trouble. >> jimmy: are there any suspects? >> well, the hollywood foreign press. i've been shaking a lot of those hands. >> jimmy: no offense, guillermo. your mom is here. is she here in the audience? >> my mom is here in the audience. >> jimmy: where is your mom? that's your mom right there. [ applause ] >> oh, gosh. they gave her a microphone. that's worse than giving me one. >> jimmy: be careful. >> i'm sorry, i really didn't want a drink. i was nervous. >> jimmy: you would get in trouble for drinking? >> i don't know. >> jimmy: is she in trouble for drinking? is that a no-no? >> tequila shots are probably not okay. >> i agree now.think she's righ.
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>> jimmy: maybe a flu shot would have been a good idea. i've seen you on the red carpet -- >> oh, it's about me. >> you saw her break the news about "the hunger games" a couple years ago at the oscars. >> jimmy: what news did she break? >> i had just -- i wasn't etch officially really offered the role yet, or maybe secretly offered the role, where it was very under wraps, don't bring it up, don't do anything. and i see my mother surrounded by reporters, "well my favorite book is "the hunger games," wink. [ laughter ] [ applause ] she gone and done it. >> jimmy: are you parents coming to the oscars with you? >> oh, of course. >> jimmy: that's a given? >> that's a given. >> jimmy: did you get them tickets yet? >> well, i've never really had a problem getting tickets for my family, which is weird, because i think that's a big struggle. normally you only get plus-one, but i think they're in the mafia
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or something. i've never had a problem getting my family tickets. >> jimmy: somehow you've managed? >> there's something going on. >> jimmy: naomi watts was here and she was saying she was having problems getting her family tickets to the oscars. but i think people are lying and making it like it's very difficult to get their family tickets. >> oh, okay. >> jimmy: because clearly you can easily get your family tickets. >> it's so easy. >> jimmy: do your parents embarrass you? i think i remember seeing you cry on like "access hollywood" or something like that. were you weeping on "access hollywood"? >> she was stepping on my foot. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: does that make you start getting teared up when your parents -- >> no, never. i'm just like stop crying, woman. my dad and i both react differently on camera. my dad and i turn into compulsive red necks and my mother just turns into a weeping willow. >> jimmy: it's a nice combination. dad's not here tonight? >> we're a totally normal family. i'm drunk. she's crying.
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>> jimmy: you're as american as anybody else. we're going to take a quick break. when we come back, we'll see a clip from "sliver linings playbook." it's a great movie. jennifer lawrence is here. we'll be right back. "ever ask somebody to lend you a foot?" "who thinks about stuff like that?" "vince mahe grew up on two continents... and noticed that wherever you go, people have their hands full, but their feet free." "the result? a liftgate you operate with your foot." "code name?" "open sesame" "the all new twenty thirteen ford escape. it's what happens when you go further." [ announcer ] to do a job well, you need the right tools. so if you're filing your taxes online, choose h&r block at home. the power software created by the tax experts. file for free now at hrblock.com.
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you may not have experienced the -- that i did, but you loved
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her. you are afraid to live. you're a hypocrite. you're a conformist. i opened up to you and you judged me. you are an -- get off me! you're harassing me! he's harassing me! >> jimmy: that is jennifer lawrence in "silver linings playbook." it is heavy in certain spots, but the movie is also very funny. and you did a fantastic job in it. bradley cooper is great in it, too. obviously, you won a golden globe. but this part that you played -- you're not like that, are you? >> i hope to god not, no. no, i'm not. >> jimmy: the director of the film, david o. russell -- jude law was here, and he seems like an odd guy and i've seen clips of some of the actors on some of his other films having like fights with him and all kinds of crazy stuff. did you have that with him? >> no.
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our biggest problem, we're the same person, so neither of us can pay attention for more than three seconds. so if it weren't for bradley, we would have never gotten anything done. >> jimmy: oh, really? >> david's thing was he would always be really close. we were doing a diner scene where he was laying down in a booth right next to me, like three inches away. and i'm talking and doing the scene and i hear him start to go, "oh, god. oh, i hate this. oh, it's so bad." i'm finally like do you want me to do something else? he's like yes, anything. >> jimmy: why does he have to be so close? does he think it's a muppets situation or something? >> i don't know. yeah. >> jimmy: he just likes to be in the action? >> i guess so, yeah. >> jimmy: wow that is very strange. >> but it works. >> jimmy: do other directors do that? >> well, no. >> jimmy: they don't. just him. would you work with him again? >> oh, my god, yeah. >> jimmy: are you prepared for
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the oscars? will you write a speech? >> no. i've started this -- it's like my only superstition of not preparing anything to say. because at first, it feels cocky. >> jimmy: i agree with you. >> it's like that seems presumptuous. we get into the car and everyone's asking me like do you have anything prepared? i'm like stop, because it just stresses me out. i don't react that way because i'm not normally on two shots of tequila. >> jimmy: you know what the worst thing is, though, i think. i don't know why i always think of this whenever i'm at an awards show. the people who have the thank you list and then go home and take off their tuxedo and then they have to take it out and throw it away. >> that's sad, yeah. i don't want to be that person. >> jimmy: it's a terrible moment. it's like a terrible memento to have really. >> yeah. that's why i just go into everything thinking like i'm a loser. and then oh, what a nice surprise. >> jimmy: the only problem is if you forget important people. are you worried that you might forget them? >> no, because fortunately those people are glaring at me.
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i can just look around. >> jimmy: and thank whoever is right there in front of you. >> exactly. they're all right there. so it's easy to remember. >> jimmy: i wish you the best. we'll be right across the street rooting for you. jennifer lawrence, her movie is called "silver linings playbook." it's in theaters now. watch the oscars sunday, february 24th. we'll be right back with katie couric. hey! hey honey! hey alan. uh, hey.... i'm bob, we talked at the tax store. i did your taxes. i thought you were a tax expert? today, i'm a master plumber. major tax stores advertise for preparers with "no tax experience necessary." at turbotax, you only get answers from cpas, eas or tax attorneys - all real tax experts. ...than h&r block stores and all other major tax stores
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>> jimmy: welcome back. still to come, music from tegan and sara. in only four short months on the air, our next guest's daytime talk show has already become the place for high profile athletes to discuss their imaginary girlfriends. "katie" airs weekdays in syndication. please say hello to katie couric.
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>> jimmy: how are you? >> your new studio -- >> jimmy: our new studio. >> your new time slot. congratulations on everything. >> jimmy: congratulations to you. i know you got picked up for a second season of your show. >> i did. >> jimmy: are you happy about that? >> i am, i am. i'm happy about it. >> jimmy: you came to our studio when we were in brooklyn and interviewed me. that seems like a lot of work what you do. >> well, it's a lot of work what you do. >> jimmy: yeah, but it's more work what you do. it's more. >> you know, i have to say it's the hardest job i've had. i've been working in television for 34 years now. [ applause ] by the way, having me follow jennifer lawrence, that is cold. that is cold. she is so cute, isn't she? >> jimmy: she really is. she's a lot of fun. but let's not -- you're pretty cute yourself.
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>> oh, jimmy. [ applause ] >> jimmy: you had the big interview. you got the big one, manti te'o. everybody wanted him. how did you talk him into talking with you? >> w basically, he apparently -- his parents apparently had watched me. likely the fellow who was helping him with crisis management issues also helps me. but i wasn't in a crisis. he just sort of helps me in general. and i think that they wanted a place where he could -- the story, you know, is so ridiculously complicated. >> jimmy: and ridiculous. >> so many twists and turns that actually i think you really needed a longer format to get through everything that happened to this guy. >> jimmy: many times in the interview, you're asking why he did something and he really didn't seem to notice. i don't know what i was thinking. >> you know, i think he got sucked into this relationship and i think he sort of stayed
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with it. i think the narrative that emerged from it was very flattering to him, that he sort of played through these double tragedies, losing his girlfriend and grandmother on the same day. and i think this was a very religious guy who focused on football, graduated from notre dame in three and a half years, and probably, to be honest with you, having a phone girlfriend, whatever this person was on the other end of the phone, was probably easier for him than having a real girlfriend. do you ever feel that way, jimmy? >> jimmy: i wouldn't know. i didn't have a real girlfriend for a very long time. >> you had an imaginary girlfriend. >> jimmy: it occurred to me, i have some friends who are very bright who didn't even get into notre dame. this numb skull somehow graduated in three and a half years. he doesn't know what the difference between a man and a woman are online. >> you know what, we listened to the voicemails. we played them on the show. and honestly, it sounded like a young woman to me. and now they're saying this
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ronaiah tuiasosopo -- i had to work very hard to learn how to say that. that it was actually his voice that had been somehow altered. >> jimmy: not according to dr. phil. and i don't believe that either. >> he said it was actually a girl's voice? >> jimmy: dr. phil called in the police to investigate it. and apparently there is like a one in ten billion chance that it's actually his voice. it didn't sound anything like him. >> right. >> jimmy: now that's another great interview. did you try get an interview with tuiasosopo? >> yes, i did try to get an interview, but apparently he wanted to be on a different -- he wanted a different venue than manti. >> jimmy: why would he want to be on with dr. phil instead of you? >> i don't know. >> jimmy: do you think dr. phil paid him? >> i don't know, possibly. >> jimmy: is it possible? >> i don't know. >> jimmy: wouldn't that be something if this somehow got paid for doing this to this football player? >> you know, stranger things have happened. i have no idea if he was paid. we don't pay our guests.
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but i have no idea. >> jimmy: well, i was paid almost a million dollars to be on your show. you weren't aware of that? >> not by us, jimmy. you know, you need pillows on these chairs because they're very deep. and if you're not a tall person, you end up -- my feet don't even touch the ground. >> jimmy: we do it to humiliate the guests. >> well-played. >> jimmy: i'm sorry, wle have that fixed for the next time you are here. i want to ask about this process. i know michael jackson is somebody that you wanted to interview. >> i did, i did. >> jimmy: you never got a chance to interview him. >> no, i had an opportunity to meet him. oftentimes when you're trying to score these big interviews, you usually meet somebody before you interview them because you want them to feel comfortable, you want to talk to them, tell them why you're interested in doing it. so i went to the four seasons, which are there are a million security guards, he had taken over like four levels of the four seasons. i met him, we sat and talked for
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probably about 15 minutes. he told me he was working on a screen play about edgar alan poe, which i thought was interesting. he was going to play edgar alan poe. we said goodbye. i was hoping that was a positive meeting and he would talk to me. the next morning after i was done with the "today" show, i get this phone call. he was working with a guy called rabbi schmooley. >> jimmy: yeah, he's a real attention whore. >> he called me and he said katie, i have a question for you. are you seeing anyone? i said at the time -- it was a couple years after my husband had passed away and i was dating someone. i was like yes, but that's kind of disgusting, aren't you married with a lot of kids? he goes no, not for me. michael is interested in going out with you. and i was like, wow. and then i thought that would be -- can you imagine going home to my daughters who were then about like 8 and 4 saying honey,
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i'm going on -- girls, i'm going on a date with michael jackson. so i thought it would just be too weird. >> jimmy: yes. >> and the tabloids would go crazy. i didn't need that. >> jimmy: it would be very, very weird. he probably would have fed you to his giraffes or something. >> now i'm just really sorry i didn't have dinner with him because it would have been a fascinating conversation. >> jimmy: just to see him lift that mask up and see what's going on under there. >> i didn't think it was worth it. when i met him, he had this very thin piece of tape down his nose and across his nose. i think it might have been during a time where he was having trouble with sort of his nose collapsing or something. >> jimmy: yeah, well we've all been there. [ laughter ] you know, larry king was here, and he said he went on a date with you. many years ago. i cannot believe that that -- i refuse to believe that that is true. is that true? >> his recollection is very different, jimmy. >> jimmy: what is your recollection of this horrible, horrible event?
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>> so, i was about 30 years old and i was going through this period of my life where i was going i'm going to go out with anybody who asks me because you learn something every time you go out with a new person. you learn something and it's something new. so i met larry at this restaurant in washington. and what can i say, jimmy? i was wearing a leather skirt. and so he called me and he asked me out to dinner. i thought well that will be really interesting. >> jimmy: katie, you're on the air. >> so he picks me up at my apartment. i lived in washington. picked me up. i came downstairs and he had a lincoln town car. he was driving the lincoln town car. i get in, he puts the tape deck and it's jack jones. ♪ i am a singer and we're driving. we go to k street to this italian restaurant. they put us right next to each other like they do to all the men and their nieces. so we're sitting there eating. and he ordered veal poached in chicken stock because he had had just had quadruple bypass, which
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was hot. so we're having a nice enough time and we're driving home. we're going over memorial bridge and that's not the way back to my apartment. i go larry, where are we going? he goes my place. [ laughter ] and i was like oh mother of god. oh, god. and i'm like dear cosmo, what do i do? i was only 30. i just could not figure out how to extricate myself from it. so we go to his apartment. we walk in, it's covered with proclamation larry king day, keys to every city in the country. that was sexy. >> jimmy: you have to be careful because you could have been like his 13th wife. >> i know, darn. so we sat there and, what can i say, he lunged. >> jimmy: incredible.
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>> i love larry, by the way. i do love him. >> jimmy: of course, who wouldn't want to have sex with larry? >> i started laughing because the whole situation was like out of a bad lifetime movie. so i said larry, you're such an interesting, nice man, but i would like to meet someone a little closer to my age. and it was like wah-wah. >> jimmy: someone from the paleolithic era. >> he said that's okay, because when i like, i really like. >> jimmy: wow. that is fantastic. >> larry has no memory of any of this. he tells the story that we were going to go upstairs. i had a roommate. i didn't have a roommate. it was the old roommate excuse. >> jimmy: it's terrific to see you. congratulations on all the success of the show. "katie" airs weekdays. we'll be right back with tegan and sara.
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>> jimmy: their new album is called "heartthrob." here with the song "closer", tegan and sara.
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♪ a little bit closer all i wanna know is can you come a little closer here comes the breath before we get a little bit closer here comes the rush before we touch come a little closer the doors are open the wind is really blowing the night sky is changing overhead it's not just all physical i'm the type who will get oh so critical so let's make things physical i won't treat you
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like you're oh so typical oh oh all you think of lately is getting underneath me all i'm dreaming lately is how to get you underneath me here comes the heat before we meet a little bit closer here comes the spark before the dark come a little closer the lights turned off and the sun is finally setting the night sky is changing overhead it's not just all physical i'm the type who will get oh so critical so let's make things physical i won't tr

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